Don't Look Down.

When working at my part-time job this weekend, I spotted a former friend of mine there.  This person used to be like a brother to me;  we went places together, hung out....we cared about one another
s well-being.  About four or five years into our friendship, things began to change.  Being a few years younger, he was still in college, about three hours away, so we only saw each other on holidays when e.  Well, around Christmas of probably his Junior or Senior year, when I saw him, I was stunned.....literally stunned.

The stick thin kid that I was accustomed to seeing was gone.  In his place was a massive, very muscular and toned young man, resembling a model from an Abercrombie & Fitch catalog.  After sitting down with our Starbucks coffee, we started chatting and catching up on things.  I remember I was saying things phrases like "Dude, you are so jacked!" and "How the hell did you go from shrimp to pimp?!"  The last question he did answer.  He said he was tired of being small; wanted to attract girls and be more attractive himself, as well as healthy.  When I asked him his secret, he just said, "I drink a lot of juice."

Ok.  Though I may educate children as my career, most of what I do is Physical Therapy-related, as well as Health/Fitness related.  it also helps that I have a personal training background too, and I can tell you that you don't go from Tiny Tim to a guy who looks like a magazine model.  it's just not possible....naturally.

Now, I don't like to put down anybody's way of life.  That's not my purpose and why I was put on Earth.  What I try to do is give you the facts and allow people to make their own decisions for themselves because it's your own life and He has given you the power of choice.  I understand the want to get BIG, trust me!  At 5'3", being big is a concept I deal with daily.  But, I would never do anything stupid either.  You all know what I'm getting at.  There's a fine line between stupidity and intellect, especially when it comes to your personal health.  I don't know if what he did was performance-enhancing or not, nor could I care, but I do know that you don't get that way by drinking juice...the legal kind anyways.  But, then again, it's your body.  You decide what you put into it, just be prepared to deal with the consequences.

Anyways, back to my former friend and the topic of this entry tonight.  Well, you know how even if you don't really care for somebody that much anymore; you see them in public and what do you do?  You make small talk.  Hi, how have you been?  Oh, that's nice.  Well, it was good to see you again, take care.  Yeah, I didn't get any of that.  Not that I was expecting it, mind you, but in the past couple of years, I've wondered how he's been because in spite of everything, I still care about him.  Anybody you have a history with, you carry feelings for them.  And for what it's worth, I hope he's happy with his life.  And although that may sound like a jab at him, I mean it in a sincere way.  Life is not some condemning circus or place to point fingers and quite frankly, I don't have the time or the energy to.  I have a life to live as well.

The question I will pose is this.  Why do we exhibit this gross behavior amongst each other? This 'holier than thou' attitude that says to others, "I'm better than you and I'm going to rub your nose in it."  Whenever you're part of a team or a group, it's not every man for himself usually.  This kids from High School Musical didn't sing a song called, "All By Myself", they sang one called "We're All In This Together!"  You can't go through your life alone and shouldn't have to.  And you should always try to be the least bit decent with people, even if you've had a falling out.  Even though people seem happy in their new lives without you, it could be just compensation, a defense mechanism or just settling for what's comfortable or new and different.  Our mind plays tricks like that all the time.  Ever wanted a new car but couldn't afford it?  You decide to go to the dealership to just look.  And then you end up with a brand new SUV that you can't afford.  Sure, it's all shiny, new and has that new car smell.  All your friends think it's awesome and it pacifies your need to fit in.  But soon on down the line, you realize that you really could've done without the new SUV because now, you're broke. It happens everyday.  But you wouldn't be human if you didn't exhibit this type of behavior.  Some things in life you let go of very easily; pain, confusion, a root canal.  But things that are most important to us are often the toughest to dismiss.  I have the fact of letting friendships die off but sometimes it's for the best.  I can only say from my experiences in my life that we're not in this life for peace; some proverbial blood has to be shed from time to time to bring good things to fruition.  Going through pain and hurtful times in our lives is as vital as drinking water.  If we don't get some every so often, we dry up and fester.

I've written before that being in a state of vulnerability makes you open to create some powerful and meaningful moments and relationships because of it.  I remember in college, me and my best buddy, Matt, whom I've spoken about on several entries on here, had some deep conversations concerning things in our personal lives.  Even to this day, we still have them and at this point, we know each other pretty well.  I think with him being an Analyst, he tends to know me better than I know myself at points, lol.  And who thought, when I met him, I couldn't stand him!  He laughed when I told him that.

In life, things come and go.  People move in and edge themselves out.  Nobody really knows why they do but I think there is a definitive reason they do though.  Someone up there is pulling the strings to make us perform this play called "Life: Unscripted."  But instead of being cast as the negative cynic, who sits on the sidelines all the time, pushing people and things away and isn't a real joy to be in the company of; be that person who, when they walk into a room, they command as well as give respect, compassion and warmth for people, because at the end of the day, what does being mad get you?  Nothing.

Also, one last thing:

Don't look down.

Unless you are helping someone else up.